Tuesday, October 22, 2013

For the Love of Truth


   I write these words with a heavy heart. A heart that is breaking for orphans and their families, both biological and adoptive. A heart that is crying out for change.
   There is an organization here in Haiti that runs a creche in a town south of Port-de-Paix. I am familiar with the organization, I know some people who have visited it and worked there, and until recently I believed it to be a good Christian ministry. The people in charge of this creche organize adoptions to the United States, and claim to perform them with the utmost integrity. They claim to do their work for the honor and glory of Jesus, and because they deeply care about the plight of orphans. Much to my dismay, we have been deceived.
   In the past few weeks I have learned from many sources that this organization is not what they seem. That the adoptions are performed illegally, that they charge enormous amounts of money for their services, and that many of the children in their creche are not even orphans. These children have families. Families who love them, and miss them, and never wanted them to leave.
   Their families were deceived into believing their child would be given a better life, or that they would only live at the creche temporarily. In some cases, these children were actually purchased from their families, for about $75. This is not “caring for the least of these”. This is not orphan care. This is human trafficking.
   Can you imagine being told that because you are poor, that you don’t deserve to be a parent? To have your child stolen from you? Can you imagine the shame of not being able to provide for your child? Feeling like you have no choice but to give your child up, so that they can go live with someone who supposedly deserves them more than you do? Knowing that you would never see them again?
   This organization has also been deceiving the adoptive families. Financial corruption in addition to the illegality of their actions concerning the children makes the completion of adoptions through this organization difficult, and in some cases, impossible.  
   Thankfully, this organization is in the process of being shut down, but it leaves in its wake an enormous amount of pain and heartbreak. Some of these adoptive families will be able to complete their adoptions. Some won’t. Some will have to start from scratch, and begin the adoption process all over again. Others will find out that their child is not an orphan at all, but has a family here in Haiti who loves and wants them. All will suffer the consequences of this organization’s actions.
   This is wrong. This is so, so wrong. That people who claim to be Christians would deceive and hurt others for financial gain, would steal children from their families, and do so in the name of Christ is despicable. It is evil. Not only do they bring ruin upon themselves, but they also dirty the reputation of Christians and mission work in Haiti. This is why trust is such a huge issue in Haiti. Why should the Haitian people trust American missionaries, when so often all we do is deceive them and hurt them?
   As horrible as this is, it is not shocking. We hear this story all the time in Haiti. An orphanage or creche is shut down because of financial corruption or because the children were being abused. Orphans are “created” to make a profit from the rich, well -meaning Americans. It is far too common. We are horrified, we are saddened, and our hearts break, but we are not surprised. And it’s not just in Haiti. This is the story of orphanages all over the world.
   Is this how it should be? Even if they are not corrupt, the condition of most orphanages is still unacceptable. And yet, is even the greatest of orphanages really what’s best for these children? Is that really what God meant when told us to care for the orphan? To put them in a building together, with no real family, where someday (if they’re young and beautiful enough) they might be adopted. Is that what it’s supposed to be like?
   How do we stop this? How can we prevent this from happening in the future? How can we prevent children being stolen from their families, raised in corrupt institutions and starved of love? What is the answer?
   Our hearts must be in line with the heart of God. We have to be willing to set aside every idea we have about how to fix things and look solely to him for our solutions. What if we stopped planning and simply let God dictate? If it is his desire to care for the orphans, he surely has a plan for how it can be accomplished.
   What if instead of putting children in orphanages, we worked on rebuilding families, providing jobs and assistance for parents, so that they can keep the children they so dearly love? God places children with the parents he planned for them. Rich or poor, black or white, Christian or not, that is where God put them, and we do not have the right to decide that we know better. God so often uses those who come from imperfect circumstances to do great things for his glory, why should we get in the way?
    I’m not saying that I’m against adoption. I have people adopting in my family right now, and I couldn’t be more excited for them! Adoption can be a very beautiful and rewarding thing, but we have to make sure that we want what Jesus wants above all else. We must be willing to dig deep and make sure the agencies we use are not trafficking or abusing children. Focusing so much on adoption that we create a market for infant “orphans” is not okay. And we cannot place adoption up on a pedestal as the ideal. It’s not. Children being raised in the families God gave them is the ideal. To really care for the orphan, we must want what is truly the best thing for them. We have to love the truth enough to put what Christ desires first.      

Preschool Pumpkins

   We have been talking a lot about Fall these past few weeks in Preschool, so last week we made pumpkins! The kids had so much fun glueing the pieces together-especially adding the teeth! They love seeing them on the doors every day, and it's fun to watch each student look for and point at the ones they made! 

Louis adding teeth.


Saronh with her pumpkin.





The Preschool pumpkin patch. :)

Meet the Preschoolers!

    Here are the thirty sweet faces of my Preschoolers! For quite a few of them it was their first time having their picture taken, so (as you'll see soon) some of them were naturals and others...not as much. They were most likely thinking, "Why is the crazy white lady pointing that thing at my face and telling me to smile?" Still cute, regardless. :) I am so blessed to be their teacher! :)




Abigaelle

Ruth

Louis

Marie

Saborah

Stephanie

Dan

James

Avery

Rose

Gabriel

Laurentz

Garvens

Jordansky

Ahssann

Gardia

Owen

Leisa

Lennley

Aline

Dayanne

Ketsia

Saronh

Jonathan

Bill

Anabelle

Carl

Marc-Baranski

Myriam



 

Wawens

Saturday, September 28, 2013

A Season of Learning

   Here (at last) is my long overdue update. A blog post has been on my to-do list for the past couple of weeks, but somehow it was never accomplished.
   A lot has happened in the month and a half that I've been back. We finished our 23rd day of Preschool yesterday, and I absolutely love it! I have thirty sweet little kids who already amaze me with how quickly they learn.
   Along with the joys come many challenges. In Preschool, we truly start from the beginning. Many of these kids had never seen a pencil or crayon before they came to Sonlight. They don't know how to hold scissors or cut paper. We have to teach them everything. And let me tell you, giving scissors to thirty three-year-olds (who have no idea how to use them) has become one of the scariest experiences of. my. life. You may laugh, but I'm serious. :) In addition to all of that, these kids don't speak English. After the last few weeks, they have memorized the simple phrases we have taught them, but the language barrier is huge. Not only do they not understand me, but my Creole is still pretty limited, so I don't understand many of the things that they tell me, either.
   So we are learning Preschool together, one day at a time. And as hard as it is, it is good. So good. Though this part of the year is incredibly difficult, I know that through God's grace it will get better and better.
   Last week I started teaching music in 2nd through 5th grades, which I am incredibly excited about! The kids are eager to learn, and they LOVE to sing and dance. However, teaching music is also proving to be a challenge. Since it is a new program, I am creating the curriculum on my own. Trying to experiment and find what works, adjusting, and teaching looks a little bit different for each grade. So again, I find myself learning with the students, but having a lot of fun while doing so!
    Despite the difficulties, God is doing amazing things, and I am learning a lot about being flexible! Prayers are greatly needed and appreciated, especially as I'm going through this challenging season in my time here. Thank you!






Sunday, August 18, 2013

It's Good to Be Back

   It's the start of a new year at Sonlight, and I can't even begin to describe how excited I am. I arrived on Thursday with the rest of my fellow missionaries (who are now like my second family) and have been spending these last couple days moving to a new apartment, getting caught up with old friends, and getting acquainted with new ones. I am so blessed to have a great new roommate, Alisha (you should check out her blog, http://sakpasealisha.blogspot.com, it's awesome) and to still be close to my old ones! School starts a week from Wednesday, and it's coming fast! I am thrilled to be teaching Preschool this year (and a little nervous, since this is new territory for me) as well as starting a music program for 2nd through 5th grades. 
    Although there have been the normal setbacks and frustrations (delayed flights, mice jumping out of boxes, leaking toilets, and unreliable air conditioning and internet), the joy of being home in Haiti makes  all of those things seem insignificant. I cannot wait to see what God will do in Port-de-Paix this year, and I am so grateful to be a part of it. 
   I want to share with you these lyrics from "Build Your Kingdom Here", a song that has recently become my prayer for Haiti.

We seek Your kingdom first
We hunger and we thirst
Refuse to waste our lives
For You're our joy and prize
To see the captive hearts released
The hurt; the sick; the poor at peace
We lay down our lives for Heaven's cause
We are Your church
We pray revive
This Earth

Build Your kingdom here
Let the darkness fear
Show Your mighty hand
Heal our streets and land
Set Your church on fire
Win this nation back
Change the atmosphere
Build Your kingdom here
We pray

Amen.

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Sorlanda

   Meet Sorlanda, one of the children at House of Hope. This sweet and spunky little girl has been my friend since my first day in Haiti (I literally went to HOH about 15 minutes after I arrived in Port-de-Paix). My sister Mackenzie and I had taken pictures with her last year when we visited Sonlight, and I was so glad to find her again this year. After  few visits she started to recognize me, and now comes running when I walk through the door with a huge smile on her face. If she's not in the front room, the other kids know she is my buddy and take me straight to her.
Sorlanda
   During my visits, we play "our" games (peek-a-boo, swinging, and braiding hair), we sing her favorite Bible songs, and we laugh. A lot. Sometimes when I come, she is really quiet, and I just hold her. This is usually after bath time. Bath time is a traumatizing experience for her (I'm not quite sure why), so if I come then, it usually takes a while for her to return to life. But she does every time, and we go right back to playing.
She sometimes get ornery and won't
look at the camera!
   Sorlanda has the most beautiful eyes, big and bright, and they light up when she smiles. She has the sweetest little voice, too. I love listening to her sing. She doesn't mind that I only know a little creole, she is perfectly content to chatter away, even if I have no idea what she's saying. I love Sorlanda.
Nephtali, Sorlanda, and Timata
Swinging!
                                                                                 


   I was really excited to see her today, because I didn't go last week, and I had missed my time with her. When I walked through the door, I was greeted by several of the other kids. I sat down and played for a few minutes, expecting to see my little friend walk in any moment. After a few minutes, I asked the other kids about her. Seeing me look around, Nephtali (one of my friends who usually takes me to Sorlanda) came over to me and said "Sorlanda avek Jemson." Sorlanda is with Jemson. This didn't surprise me, as Jemson is Sorlanda's older brother (and a really sweet little guy), but I didn't see him, either. I asked where they were, and Nephtali said "Ale lakay." They had gone to their house. I was confused, but I thought she might not know what she was talking about, so I asked one of the HOH people. To my dismay, Nephtali was right, Sorlanda had gone home. 
   Her mother had come to get her and her brother two days ago. House of Hope has no choice but to send children home if their parents come, even if the kids aren't ready yet. They told me that her mother almost reconsidered  while she was there, because she said she doesn't have money or food to care for them. But whether or not that is true, she took them. My sweet friend is gone, and I didn't even get to say goodbye. 
   I knew that this could happen.  I knew. I was mentally preparing myself to say goodbye-perhaps permanently-when I left for the summer. But not now. Not now. Not when I didn't go last week, when I'm not ready. Not when she may not have food at home. When I have no idea where she lives, or who her family is. 
   I do know that God knows. I know that He sees her, that He loves her even more than I do. I know that He knows how frustrated I am with this situation and all the others like it in Haiti. Because it frustrates Him, too. I know that He sees how much my heart is hurting tonight, and that His hurts, too. I know that if He wants us to be together again, we will be. I know these things, but it doesn't make it easier. I'm still so, so sad. I still miss my girl. I still wonder if she has food tonight. If I'm ever going to see her again. I still can't stop thinking about her.
   But I'm also thankful for a God who cares. A God who lets me run to Him, holds me through my tears and patiently listens to my endless questions tonight. A God who I can trust to do what is best. A God who will never leave or forsake me, who is there through every hurt, every storm, and who will one day wipe away every single tear from our faces.
My sweet friend.


 

Friday, April 12, 2013

END IT

   Tuesday, April 9th, was END IT day. For those of you who don't know what END IT is, or those of you who were wondering why red X's were cluttering your Facebook newsfeed on Tuesday, you're about to find out.
   Back in January, I attended the Passion conference in Atlanta, Georgia. It was an amazing week, with incredible speakers and worship. However, this year Passion also helped launch END IT, a movement to promote awareness of slavery and human trafficking.
   I knew that this was an issue before I went to Passion, but I didn't think about it much. Now I do. That week opened my eyes and broke my heart. 27 million people enslaved. The average cost of of one of those human slaves today? About $76 US currency, less than an iPod. This sickened me. The faces of the eight year old slave boy on a fishing boat, the five year old girl forced into prostitution in Cambodia, the family in India forced to make bricks by hand for twelve hours a day...they've stayed with me. I came home shaken...and angry. Angry at the people who enslave others. Angry at the condition of our world. Angry at myself, for not knowing and not caring about it.
   Thankfully, Passion had provided us with info on some great resources. In addition to promoting END IT, they showcased several other organizations that fight human trafficking. Polaris Project, Not For Sale, A21, Made in a Free World (Slavery Footprint), Love 146 and International Justice Mission. One of the first things they encouraged us to do was go to www.slaveryfootprint.org (which I recommend that you do as well), and take the quiz to see how many slaves worked for us individually. I was a little reluctant-ignorance is bliss, after all-but I did it anyway. To my horror, I discovered that I have at least thirty three slaves working for me. Thirty three. And now that I knew, I had to choose to ignore it, or do something about it. I chose to do something.
   It was harder than I thought it would be. Almost everything is made with slave labor. Ballpoint pens, electronics, clothes, makeup, coffee (why? why coffee?!), chai tea (not this, too!), and even chocolate (seriously? As if the coffee and chai weren't bad enough already!) are all made with slave labor. And those are only the items that immediately affected me.
   Thanks to the internet, all was not lost. My mother (who after hearing me rant for three days after Passion, and taking the SF quiz herself, decided to join the madness) discovered fair trade health and beauty products at the Body Shop. Conveniently, there was a store not terribly far from us. We found fair trade coffee (yes!), chai (yes!!!) and even chocolate (YES!) at Ten Thousand Villages (for those of you back home reading this, both stores are in Champaign/Urbana-go!)
   In addition to all this, I got an END IT action pack, and I planned on painting my town red (figuratively, of course), come April 9th. And then God turned my world upside down and moved me to Haiti.
   In the midst of all that, END IT wasn't exactly the first thing on my mind, so I didn't think much of it. Until I started to realize that living in Haiti made my anti-slavery activism...difficult. The people of Port-de-Paix know nothing of END IT. Neither did most of the missionaries here. Many things that I had hoped to do were no longer a possibility. Standing outside for 27 hours for the 27 million? Something I had hoped to do at home, but not practical for Haiti. I was slightly discouraged, but I opted to look on the bright side, sharing photos, pages, and statuses on Facebook. On February 27th, END IT had a "disappear on social media day". Aha! Something I could do, even from here! Except that our internet decided to be so slow that day, I couldn't log in to Facebook, let alone deactivate my account. Hmph. Another decrease in morale level.
   So here I was, April 9th. END IT day. I wore a red dress to school, and changed to my END IT shirt afterwards and drew the red X on my hand. I would have worn the X during school, but decided not to, since I would have had to explain to my kids that: A- I do not have a tattoo, B- yes, your teacher did, in fact, draw on herself (which I'm constantly telling them NOT to do), and C- tell them why their teacher drew on herself (explaining human trafficking to first graders? I think not). But none of this mattered. In a city of random t-shirts, my white skin draws way more attention than what I wear. That red X on my hand? I uploaded  a photo to Instagram and Facebook, but what is that worth? What good does that do when there are 27 million people desperate for help?
   Frustrated and feeling useless, I prayed. Jesus, I want so badly to make a difference? I know there is slavery in Haiti, but I don't see it. What can I do?
   And then they came to me. Thirty one little faces that I get to see almost every day came to my mind. Thirty one precious kids that are receiving an education-and as a result will never have to face a life of slavery. Fifteen sweet little girls that will never be forced into sex slavery. Sixteen crazy (but also sweet) boys, who will never work as slaves. They can speak English. They can speak French. They can read and write. With God working through me, they will get even better. Slavery will never be something they have to fear.
   Deep gratitude filled me. Thank you Jesus, for using me. For allowing me to be a part of Your plan to break the chains of the slaves. Even though it doesn't look quite like I thought it would, I'm making a difference. One day in a first grade classroom didn't seem like much to me at first, but now I can see a hint of the long term results. And ultimately, it's not up to me to stop human trafficking. It's not up to me, or Passion, IJM, or any other person or organization. It's up to God. Which is really for the best, because He cannot lose. All we have to do is be faithful where He's put us. Which for some of us, might be in a non-profit organization. It might be rescuing girls in Cambodia. It might be sharing a movement via social networking. It might be standing for 27 hours on a college campus. It might be organizing a rescue hotline for those stuck in prostitution.
   For me, it's first grade classroom. So I'll keep praying for those who are in chains. I'll keep sharing photos. And I'll keep doing my best to be faithful where I am, one phonics lesson at a time.

Monday, April 1, 2013

A Trip to Saint Louis du Nord

   We are on spring break here at Sonlight, so today Megan, Tara and I went to Saint Louis du Nord with Megan's Bible study girls. We took a tap tap to the market, and then walked through the mountains to a waterfall. We had to cross the river a few times, which made it feel like an adventure! It was a long walk, but it was so much fun and completely worth it! It was absolutely gorgeous, the more I see of Haiti, the more I fall in love with this country!   When we (finally) got to the waterfall,  we waded into the pool at the bottom and spent an hour swimming, climbing on the rocks, and just having fun! Some local kids got curious and came to watch us, so before we left we taught them a few songs, like "This is the Day" in creole. They loved it!
   We walked back to the market and took a tap tap to an "American" store we'd heard about. They had all sorts of things you can't usually find here, like candy, popcorn, juice, and cookies. Outside the store was a snack bar where they had drinks, pizza, and ice cream! Ice cream is a treat in Haiti, and it's nearly impossible to find, so we were really excited to get some. The owner of the store came to talk to us, and took us inside the restaurant he's opening soon. It's all indoors, air-conditioned, and will serve American food like hotdogs, cheeseburgers, fries, pizza, and ice cream. It looks like it's going to be really nice, and we're hoping to go back when it opens! We headed back to Port-de-Paix and are having the girls sleep over tonight. It has been an awesome day! Below are some pictures of our trip.